I wanted to write a blog for a long time now but all the subject which came up faded away in me very quickly. I wanted to write about my challenges as a mother, trying to succed in London, being a wife but all these are what I talk about when I have to make small talk.

Everybody talk about these. All the time.

On the playground it's always kid talk, with girl feieds it's always husband talk and so on.

The only thing what I dread to talk about is being an expat.
It confuses me totally.
I am a very friendly person and can feel at home everywhere, can make friends in no time.
I live in London as a Hungarian, have a Hungarian husband, both of us with respectable careers.
We have a kid who has no idea where to belong but does not take it badly...yet.

I looked around in the last couple of weeks and have seen many friend spending time in Budapest, enjoying the beautiful Hungarian summer, visiting family or recently moved back from somewhere abroad. Each of us are totally unique because of our circumstances or life but there was ONE shared thing in all of us. The feeling where you do not belong anywhere anymore.

We are not home in Hungary anymore as we spent many years trying or even fully assimilating into different cultures, learning to live like them.
But we will never be them as we have different roots and they don't get our childhood jokes.

I love London and would be anle to live here forever but it will never be my Home.
And I could move back to Budapest and be happy there but that won't be Home ever again either.

Our generation have the gift of being free, travelling and living our life as we want of where we want.
But will this Lost generation ever find a place to really vall Home,
Will we ever be able to enjoy our city wothout compairing it to an other one?

I have so many things on my pro'n'con list I can't even count...

Will I ever feel stable again?